Tamara M. Allen is a self-transformation consultant, offering educational, business, and leadership solutions.
Unmasc-Qing Cycles: Diversity Dialogues
About the Series
Unmasc-Qing is a unique and inclusive dialogue series created specifically for Black Masculine-Identified Women (MOC) and their supporters. Inspired by the Unmasc-Qing: Shadow Work Journal for black masculine-identified women, the series provides a safe, affirming space where participants can explore the complexities of their identity, particularly around identity, spirituality, sexuality, healing, and more. The series offers a platform for deep, meaningful conversations about the challenges of navigating religious institutions and reconciling sexuality with faith. It aims to foster understanding, healing, and a sense of belonging through shared experiences, reflection, and community engagement.
Each session brings together MOC women, allies, and guest facilitators to unpack topics often overlooked or stigmatized in mainstream religious and social spaces. Sessions are designed to be interactive, encouraging participants to contribute their voices and experiences in a supportive environment.
What to Expect
The Unmasc-Qing series offers a safe, open, and affirming environment where Black Masculine-Identified Women (MOC) can explore their identities, engage in honest conversations, and experience healing. Each session is designed to provide both personal reflection and community support through interactive discussions, guided by the themes inspired by the UnmascQing Shadow Work Journal.
Community Storytelling and Sharing: Participants are encouraged to share personal stories, engage in group discussions, and explore their unique experiences as MOC women. These conversations are designed to foster mutual support, create connection, and validate each other’s journeys.
Guided Reflections and Journal Prompts: Drawing from the UnmascQing Shadow Work Journal, each session begins with a guided reflection on the day’s topic, providing structure to help participants delve deeper into their personal experiences. These reflections serve as a catalyst for discussions around self-expression, relationships, emotional well-being, and community interactions.
Healing from Trauma and Emotional Growth: One of the core objectives of the series is healing from personal and collective trauma, including "church hurt," childhood experiences, and relational challenges. Participants will engage in conversations aimed at fostering emotional growth, addressing vulnerabilities, and overcoming societal pressures to suppress emotions, especially in MOC spaces.
Discussions on Identity and Self-Expression: Expect conversations about the varied identities within the MOC community (butch, stud, aggressive, masc), and how personal appearance plays a role in that identity, from clothing choices to tattoos, facial hair, and accessories like straps. This is a space to embrace your authentic self and engage in discussions about navigating societal expectations around masculinity and femininity.
Practical Conversations on Relationships and Sexual Health: The series creates a space for open discussions around sexual health, intimacy, and relationship dynamics. Topics include sexual practices (such as the use of straps and BDSM), hygiene, and maintaining healthy, intimate relationships. The dialogue extends into discussing gender roles in relationships, co-parenting, and navigating family dynamics as MOC women.
Safe Space for Exploring Vulnerability: Vulnerability and emotional openness are key components of the Unmasc-Qing experience. Participants are encouraged to let down their emotional walls, explore their challenges, and reflect on their own resilience. Discussions will address topics like being a provider in the household, navigating masculinity without toxic traits, and finding strength in vulnerability.
Engagement with Social and Cultural Perspectives: Each session delves into the cultural dynamics MOC women face, including interactions with femmes, relationships with straight women, and broader societal perceptions. Participants will discuss the complexities of their roles in the LGBTQ+ community and how these social interactions influence their sense of self.
Key Themes
I. Identity and Self-Expression
Inspired by journal prompts, these sessions explore generational differences in identity, such as butch, stud, aggressive, and masc. Attendees discuss physical appearance, from tattoos and facial hair to the nuances of clothing choices (sports bras vs. regular bras, panties vs. boxers, wearing straps daily). This theme encourages participants to embrace their unique expressions and unpack societal expectations around appearance.
II. Relationships and Dynamics
Delve into the complexities of relationships, including partnership roles, gender expectations, and family dynamics. Topics include studsman (studs in husband roles), stud-on-stud relationships, parenting as a stepdaddy, and the challenges of co-parenting after a breakup. Attendees will also discuss toxic masculinity and domestic violence, creating a space for healing and reflection on personal and relational dynamics.
III. Sexual Health and Practices
A space to discuss sexual health and intimacy openly. This session addresses various sexual activities, including oral sex, scissoring, using straps, and BDSM (50 Shades of Masc). Practical topics like hygiene, vaginal health, and safe sex practices, including the use of condoms, will be highlighted to promote informed, healthy sexual practices within the community.
IV. Psychological and Emotional Well-being
Inspired by self-reflection exercises in the journal, these sessions cover personal challenges such as childhood trauma and masc vulnerability. Attendees will explore the emotional complexities of being MOC, including the roles of "touch me not" individuals and the pressures of being providers in their households. This space encourages MOC women to be vulnerable and find strength in their emotional well-being.
V. Social and Cultural Perspectives
Participants will reflect on interactions within the broader LGBTQ+ community and with femmes, including pursuing straight women. This session examines the social and cultural dynamics MOC women face and the pressures of navigating these interactions while maintaining their identity.
Why Attend?
This series, inspired by the UnmascQing Shadow Work Journal, offers a profound opportunity for Black MOC women to reflect, heal, and connect with others facing similar experiences. The sessions encourage honest dialogue about the challenges of navigating identity, relationships, and emotional health in a supportive, empowering community setting.